a thought..

how awesome would it be if pseu-pseu pseudio were the universal panacea?
like your friend is all, “I think I might be pregnant by that dude that had herpes and has like a thousand other babies."
and you’re all, "dude. I'm sorry to hear that but pseu-pseu-pseudio."
and then your friend was all, "I am totally going to have this baby and one day it will cure venereal diseased people everywhere. I will raise the other thousand babies and they will each become geniuses in their own right and all will be well in the world."

just think about it for a while.
then try it out and see what kind of reaction you get.

keep me posted.
or don't.
but always remember, pseu-pseu pseudio.

Merry Golden Globe's Nominations Everyone...

The GG's are January 13 with folks showing off their fanciness @ 3:00.
Show starts at 6:00.
I recommend TiVo the first hour or two and then you can fast forward through the longwinded douchebag speeches..

p.s. Where in the hell is Josh Brolin for No Country for Old Men?
Um, Hollywood Foreign Press Association has some sand in the vagina for sure...


The list:


Best Motion Picture - Drama
American Gangster
Atonement
Eastern Promises
The Great Debaters
Michael Clayton
No Country for Old Men
There Will Be Blood


Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture - Drama
Cate Blanchett - Elizabeth: The Golden Age
Julie Christie - Away From Her
Jodie Foster - The Brave One
Angelina Jolie - A Mighty Heart
Keira Knightley - Atonement



Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture - Drama
George Clooney - Michael Clayton
Daniel Day-Lewis - There Will Be Blood
James McAvoy - Atonement
Viggo Mortensen - Eastern Promises
Denzel Washington - American Gangster




Best Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy
Across the Universe
Charlie Wilson's War
Hairspray
Juno
Sweeney Todd



Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy
Amy Adams - Enchanted
Nikki Blonsky - Hairspray
Helena Bonham Carter - Sweeney Todd
Marion Cotillard - La Vie en Rose
Ellen Page - Juno




Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy
Johnny Depp - Sweeney Todd
Ryan Gosling - Lars and the Real Girl
Tom Hanks - Charlie Wilson's War
Philip Seymour Hoffman - The Savages
John C. Reilly - Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story




Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in a Motion Picture
Cate Blanchett - I'm Not There
Julia Roberts - Charlie Wilson's War
Saoirse Ronin - Atonement
Amy Ryan - Gone Baby Gone
Tilda Swinton - Michael Clayton




Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role in a Motion Picture
Casey Affleck - The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
Javier Bardem - No Country for Old Men
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Charlie Wilson's War
John Travolta - Hairspray
Tom Wilkinson - Michael Clayton



Best Animated Feature Film
Bee Movie
Ratatouille
The Simpsons Movie



Best Foreign Language Film
4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
The Kite Runner
Lust, Caution
Persepolis




Best Director - Motion Picture
Tim Burton - Sweeney Todd
Ethan and Joel Coen - No Country for Old Men
Julian Schnabel - The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Ridley Scott - American Gangster
Joe Wright - Atonement




Best Screenplay - Motion Picture
Diablo Cody - Juno
Ethan and Joel Coen - No Country for Old Men
Christopher Hampton - Atonement
Ronald Harwood - The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Aaron Sorkin - Charlie Wilson's War




Best Television Series - Drama
Big Love
Damages
Grey's Anatomy
House
Mad Men
The Tudors




Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series - Drama
Patricia Arquette - Medium
Glenn Close - Damages
Minnie Driver - The Riches
Edie Falco - The Sopranos
Sally Field - Brothers & Sisters
Holly Hunter - Saving Grace
Kyra Sedgwick - The Closer




Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Series - Drama
Michael C. Hall - Dexter
Jon Hamm - Mad Men
Hugh Laurie - House
Jonathan Rhys Meyers - The Tudors
Bill Paxton - Big Love




Best Television Series - Musical or Comedy
30 Rock
Californication
Entourage
Extras
Pushing Daisies



Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series - Musical or Comedy
Christina Applegate - Samantha Who?
America Ferrera - Ugly Betty
Anna Friel - Pushing Daisies
Tina Fey - 30 Rock
Mary-Louise Parker - Weeds



Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Series - Musical or Comedy
Alec Baldwin - 30 Rock
Steve Carell - The Office
David Duchovny - Californication
Ricky Gervais - Extras
Lee Pace - Pushing Daisies



Best Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee
The Company
Five Days
Longford
The State Within


Best Performance by an Actress in a Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Bryce Dallas Howard - As You Like It
Queen Latifah - Life Support
Debra Messing - The Starter Wife
Sissy Spacek - Pictures of Hollis Woods
Ruth Wilson - Jane Eyre (Masterpiece Theater)



Best Performance by an Actor in a Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Adam Beach - Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee
Ernest Borgnine - A Grandpa for Christmas
Jim Broadbent - Longford
Jason Isaacs - The State Within
James Nesbitt - Jekyll



Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in Series, Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Rose Byrne - Damages
Rachel Griffiths - Brothers & Sisters
Katherine Heigl - Grey's Anatomy
Samantha Morton - Longford
Anna Paquin - Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee
Jaime Pressly - My Name Is Earl



Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role in Series, Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Ted Danson - Damages
Kevin Dillon - Entourage
Jeremy Piven - Entourage
Andy Serkis - Longford
William Shatner - Boston Legal
Donald Sutherland - Dirty Sexy Money

It's Beginning to Look A Lot like Gossip...

Hey dudes,

hope you are well and healthy and happy and there are actually people reading this besides me..
some interesting gossip has come about as late so let us celebrate this poop and get busy..


Jessica Alba is preggers.
I'm sure you heard but I gotta put it out there.
Her boyfriend will now be known for two things, being Jessica Alba's boyfriend and being Jessica Alba's baby's daddy.
No me gusta the Alba.
But she is pretty and she dresses well.
Anywho you can read all about it Here



I swore I would not mention Eva Longwhoria but this is just too good if it's true.
Some Frenchy model is saying that she made sexy time with Tony Small Balls Parker.
That's Longwhoria's hubby and a basketball player for a lame team or whatever..
Anywho here is the Scoop
I totally believe this.
Even if it wasn't true, I still believe it.
As evil as it sounds, I would be more then happy for this to be true.
Did I mention that this should be true?
I want Longwhoria to fall off the face of the earth so I never have to see her just about anywhere.
She looks like she wears dirty underwear and according to this story, had an affair with A.C. Slater, whom I saw at Tower Records once and he was the size of Screech.



So Ethan Hawke did cheat on Uma Thurman.
The woman in question or douche happened to be the Thurman/Hawke nanny.
Nice one.
I remember when Hawke was semi good looking, around Reality Bites.
But then his teeth started to look like an 80 year-old British man who never heard of a toothbrush or Crest or floss or a dentist or hygiene.
He also became incredible pretentious, could not handle his wife's fame and decided to write shit books that only 80 year-old British men who have never heard of a toothbrush or Crest or floss or a dentist or hygiene read.
Anywho's you can read all the nasty Here



This post seems to be about cheating spouses or break ups or my happiness.
Gwynnie Pooptrow and Pussy Martin seemed to have gone through a rough patch and are now on the up and up.
The story is Here
Good for them.
Really.
I despise them both with the whole heart of my being but I mean I wouldn't wish the worst on them.
Eva Logwhoria, yes.
Pooptrow has enough issues.
She hasn't made a decent film in years and her career is in the crapper.
Her children will straight up murder her ass when they get older because she named one a fruit and the other has to live up to the name of a holier then though dude who God thought was the bizomb.
She ruined her husband and his band.
Brad Pitt lost cool points when he was with her.
She stole the Oscar from Blanchett.
She ruined Ben Affleck por vida.
So, basically, she's the kiss of death and her husband has sand in his vagina and sings about it and all is right in the world.
High five.




Um, on a happier not Uma Thurman is on the cover of Bazaar and she looks lovely and is just about awesome.
No sand in this vagina folks she left that up to her ex-husband.
Faboo



Have we talked about the Cloonester and his lady friend?
Girlfriend is very pretty.
They met when she was a go go dancer/waitress in Vegas, so bitch is lucky.
She was also on Fear Factor or whateves.
George rules the school in my opinion.
He's hot and humble and down to earth and no sand in this vagina..
Hottt



homies.
that is all i've got tonight.
keep it real and the sand outta your vag..
peaces greases...

fashion giant who has a wife with a midget sized personality- PR #4.3

So this week’s challenge was to create a three-piece outfit for former NFL dude Tiki Barber.
Tiki is a correspondent on The Today Show and would wear the winning piece on air.
The designers shit their pants cause most have never designed menswear and the ones that have, have little experience.
Except for I'm Not Gay Kevin who thought he had this one in the bag.
By bag, I don't mean gay cause Kevin isn't gay.
Did you know that?
The super fabulous twist was that the designers were randomly assigned male models.


Anywho, this challenge was, in a word, craptastical.
Slave labor midget mole people children, who have not seen the light of day, are blind, deaf and dumb, had to have made the poop that came down that runway.
I mean what the heck bro.





The only saving grace was Kit, who I have grown fond of.
The girl can sew, create some sweet designs, dresses well and is all around a swell gal.
She also seems to be less drama and I just read that she is a stylist over at E!, so that's cool, I guess.
I'm going to give her thumbs up.
Her suit looked good on the model and was three pieces as was asked for by the Tiki.



Jack ended up winning the challenge.
His two-piece, not three mind you, stripetastic suit was okay.
It fit the model well but I was not having the stripes.
Tiki was cool with it and really what does he know.


I mean he basically told all of America that his wife owns him.
She picks out his clothes.
Hold up, I'm paraphrasing.
Tiki said that he and his wife go shopping and she helps him.
Helps him spend his money on crap that she picks out and he shakes his head in a yes fashion, in fear of being beaten.
I only make this assumption about the wife cause she, Ginny, showed up later in the episode to pass judgment on the designers.
Christian said she was fabulous and tan.
He also shared that he loves Asians and that they are fierce.
I would and will totally agree on that front.


Anywho, Ginny Barber is a straight up tool.
There is nothing going in that old noggin.
Woman looked like someone just woke her ass up, threw on some overly expensive and unattractive dress on her and pulled a string to make her talk.
I fell asleep during most of her airtime but I woke up when she got to Carmen.
Somehow the thing that died in Ginny came alive and the fierce that Christian mentioned was awakened.
She ripped Carmen and her design a new one.
Straight up called Carmen's jacket a Members' Only replica.
Now if Carmen were dressing a dirty hipster, this would be a good thing.



This episode did show the designers personalities a bit more and that was refreshing.

Christian has seemed to lose the ability to walk from his apartment to Parsons so Jack carries him as part of his man bag.
I thought that that was kind of cute.



Sweet P could not design a freakin man's shirt but girlfriend tried and I dig that.
Being that Victorya and Carmen, who were as unfamiliar with men's wear as Sweet P, asked if they could use Jack's pants as a pattern and Sweet P just went for it, gives her an extra gold star.
She kinda got reamed on the runway but took it in stride and was in complete agreement with the judges.
Me likey that Sweet P.
Good name too.




I'm Not A Gay had to mention that he was not gay, again.
Most of the dude designers were beyond stoked to have the male models walking around half naked.
But Kev had to point out that he was not interested.
Thanks for clearing that one up moron, I don't think we heard you the first 1,000 times you said it.
Me no likey the Kevin.
Or his stupid goatee face hair thing.
He looks like the ugly one in a boy band.




Elisa is a complete and total prude.
She tells her model to undress as she turns her back as not to look at his hott piece.
She explains to the viewers at home that she has been with the same dude for a while and only has eyes for his sweet bod.
I bet they met at the Ren Faire.
Probably over some mutton and ale.
He in his natural leather sandals, blowsy shirt, leather vest and snug fitting pants, without pockets if possible.
She in a blowsy dress and flowery headband with her tatas hanging out, ready to play some D & D.
Me throwing up in my mouth a little and holding myself in the fetal position waiting for the Ren Faire to pass through town and not rub its cooties on me.



As I said before Jack won.
Kit was in the top with I'm Not Gay.
Sweet P, Ricky Crytardo and Carmen were at the bottom.
Crytardo did the unexpected and cried but was spared.
The dude took way too much on even enlisting the help of his model to finish the outfit.
However the design was not as bad as say, Carmen's.



Um, yeah.
That thing was all kinds of bad.
The design was not that cool either.
Ha!
Did you catch that?
I made a joke and a call on Carmen at the same time.
High five!
Did I mention that homegirl forgot to make the frickin shirt?
Anywho, CW got the boot and I can't say that I'm bummed.
Now she can go back to that deluxe kiosk in the sky and design some t-shirts for the masses.


With that, I bid you goodnight.
I also would like to apologize for the Ren Faire comment.
I totally didn't mean to give you all nightmares.
The Ren Faire is like that clown in IT for me dude.
For reals.
Peaces Greases..

If you have not..

seen Hot Rod, do so.
immediately.
like now.
i still see you.
go.
now.

The Truth was that this episode was filler the Consequence was that I won't be giving a full recap #2.10

Yo, yo, yo.

So Junk in the Trunk chose Sylar over her bro and in turn signed his death warrant.
By death warrant I mean Sylar stabbing Twin Brother American Me style.


Cheertator said goodbye to her pops by dumping his ashes in the ocean a la Big Lebowski and then threatened Powder by punching a window in her car rental.
She also told P that she and her family were not going to run anymore and were going to expose The Company and blah, blah, blah get rid of David Copperfield.


Hiro Nakagoodstoryline and HottAndo do some Scooby Dooing into Hott Monroe's past.
They find out that Hottroe was incarcerated by poppa Sulu back in the day.
So Hiro travels to the 70's and finds out that Hott Monroe had tried to release a deadly virus.
Hmm, sounds familiar.
That one lady from The Company photo that Bitchy Patrelli gave up in last episode stopped Hottroe.
Her name is Victoria but we will be calling her That One Lady.
Anywho, she tells young version of Sulu that if that virus is let loose everyone in the whole freakin world will die and that he needs to destroy it.
Sulu tells That One Lady that that might be a good idea in theory but he would rather ship off the deadly, death to thousands virus, to Texas where it will be safe but actually it won't.
That One Lady tells Sulu that she is out like Casino.


Meanwhile Hottrelli and Hottroe visit That One Lady in the present, to find out where the Shanti virus is.
She pulls a gun on them.
She tells Hottrelli what we all know, that Hottroe is a liar and using him and that he wants to release the virus not save the world from it.
Hottrelli gets that hott yet wide eyed puzzled look on his face and tells That Lady to go f' herself.
But not before using his mind reading power and finding out the virus is in Texas.
Hottroe gets over That One Lady and kills her and leaves his "S" or "F" joker card.
Hottrelli is all, "Why'd you do that?"
Hottroe is all, "Cause she was going to try and kill you by shooting you in the head. Duh."
I'm all, "I think that since Hottrelli has the same power as Hottroe then the only way for Hottroe to die would be to shoot him in the head too."
I also said, "Foreshadowing?"


Retardhinder Raj tells Ned that he has found the cure to Niki's virus.
It happens to be Cheertator's blood that saved ODB's life that Raj the retard has left to rot in a jail.
Die Raj, die.
Anywho, Ned gets all fakey excited.
Raj then lays it out on the line by telling Ned that he needs to help Raj destroy all of the virus' The Company has in their arsenal.
Ned's all, "Oh sure, sure," and Raj is all, "Okay, great!"
Then Ned says, "Douche."
I say, yes indeed.

Ni one K i and Sol Glo are hanging.
Sol Glo's Good Burger cousin steals his backpack with his comics and his pops medal and tries to sell it to some homies.
Good Burger got the shaft from the homies.
Sol Glo threatens to shake off his hair sweat on Good Burger if he doesn't get his crap back.
Good Burger says no dice and so does Ni one K i when Sol Glo suggests using their super powers.
So Super Cousin, who does the weird mouth thing, says she will help the Sol.
She sneaks him out in the middle of the night in a ninjaesque velour sweat suit to go get the goods at some gangster’s house.
Well I won't keep you in suspense, the homies come home find Super Cousin and throw her in some van then they drive away with their guns in the air, cheering.
Sol Glo sees this all and then starts to walk home in a really fast manner saying, "Oh shit, oh shit."


Raj calls Ni one K i and tells her he's got a cure for her and will be on the first plane out.
Ni one K i is stoked and wants to share the news with her glistened haired son but he is at some homies house getting in deep doo doo.
Raj's call waiting happens and Butt Powers, (Sylar) gives him the great news that the call is coming from inside Raj's house.
Butt Powers strokes Poltergeist Molly's hair and marvels at those chompers all the while winking at goofy grinning Junk in the Trunk and telling Raj that they will patiently wait for his return at his house.
Um, where the f is Porkman?
Ahh, eating, right.


Hottrelli and Hottroe get to Texas to find the Shanti virus.
But not before HiNo stops time, finds out that Hottrelli has teamed up with his arch nemesis and then challenges Hottrelli to a battle royal.


Next week, a season finale will happen that may just be a fall finale and not a whole season finale, cross your fingers.
Also, some folks will die.
Is it bad that I am hoping one of those peeps is Junk in the Trunk?
Is it even worse that I have been praying to the Heroes writing dudes to kill of Raj at the hand of ODB?
No?
Good. Good.

guess who..

will have a spring collection at the Target?
Hmm