It's Beginning to Look A Lot like Gossip...

Hey dudes,

hope you are well and healthy and happy and there are actually people reading this besides me..
some interesting gossip has come about as late so let us celebrate this poop and get busy..


Jessica Alba is preggers.
I'm sure you heard but I gotta put it out there.
Her boyfriend will now be known for two things, being Jessica Alba's boyfriend and being Jessica Alba's baby's daddy.
No me gusta the Alba.
But she is pretty and she dresses well.
Anywho you can read all about it Here



I swore I would not mention Eva Longwhoria but this is just too good if it's true.
Some Frenchy model is saying that she made sexy time with Tony Small Balls Parker.
That's Longwhoria's hubby and a basketball player for a lame team or whatever..
Anywho here is the Scoop
I totally believe this.
Even if it wasn't true, I still believe it.
As evil as it sounds, I would be more then happy for this to be true.
Did I mention that this should be true?
I want Longwhoria to fall off the face of the earth so I never have to see her just about anywhere.
She looks like she wears dirty underwear and according to this story, had an affair with A.C. Slater, whom I saw at Tower Records once and he was the size of Screech.



So Ethan Hawke did cheat on Uma Thurman.
The woman in question or douche happened to be the Thurman/Hawke nanny.
Nice one.
I remember when Hawke was semi good looking, around Reality Bites.
But then his teeth started to look like an 80 year-old British man who never heard of a toothbrush or Crest or floss or a dentist or hygiene.
He also became incredible pretentious, could not handle his wife's fame and decided to write shit books that only 80 year-old British men who have never heard of a toothbrush or Crest or floss or a dentist or hygiene read.
Anywho's you can read all the nasty Here



This post seems to be about cheating spouses or break ups or my happiness.
Gwynnie Pooptrow and Pussy Martin seemed to have gone through a rough patch and are now on the up and up.
The story is Here
Good for them.
Really.
I despise them both with the whole heart of my being but I mean I wouldn't wish the worst on them.
Eva Logwhoria, yes.
Pooptrow has enough issues.
She hasn't made a decent film in years and her career is in the crapper.
Her children will straight up murder her ass when they get older because she named one a fruit and the other has to live up to the name of a holier then though dude who God thought was the bizomb.
She ruined her husband and his band.
Brad Pitt lost cool points when he was with her.
She stole the Oscar from Blanchett.
She ruined Ben Affleck por vida.
So, basically, she's the kiss of death and her husband has sand in his vagina and sings about it and all is right in the world.
High five.




Um, on a happier not Uma Thurman is on the cover of Bazaar and she looks lovely and is just about awesome.
No sand in this vagina folks she left that up to her ex-husband.
Faboo



Have we talked about the Cloonester and his lady friend?
Girlfriend is very pretty.
They met when she was a go go dancer/waitress in Vegas, so bitch is lucky.
She was also on Fear Factor or whateves.
George rules the school in my opinion.
He's hot and humble and down to earth and no sand in this vagina..
Hottt



homies.
that is all i've got tonight.
keep it real and the sand outta your vag..
peaces greases...